Why would either want to win? The chattering class will still hate him

Tonight we are going to see history made when America either votes for its first black President (probable) or its oldest first term President (not so probable). But you also get the added bonus that it will be a great one term Presidency, as they take over the poisoned chalice of economic chaos, and then spend two years dripping the message out in Khrushchev style that the problem is all because of their predecessor. There is a second term to win after all!

There is "live blogging" of the American spectacular going on all over the place. Personally, if you can be bothered to stay up I would pay attention to the US blogs rather than the UK ones. Places like Liberal Conspiracy will - if predictions and polls are right - no doubt be crowing (whilst live blogging MSM coverage, how 2.0!). Meanwhile, places like ConHome et al will - if predictions and polls are right - be trying to spin it as the beginning of the end of America, or not so bad for the GOP (whilst live blogging MSM coverage, how 2.0!).

However, if of couse the crazy upset occurs, and the GOP win, then I guarantee it will not be long before the left-wing blogosphere in the UK starts to talk in that serious Michael Moore way and finds reasons why it was all a big conspiracy. You know the drill, America is inherently racist; hanging chads; it was stolen; and the usual sort of crap that will ensure that people like Tim Ireland keep moaning on about "war, it's legal, it's lovely" for the next four years in the echo chamber that is the UK blogosphere.

Of course, if, (as predictions and polls say), Obama romps home, then for the next few months the left-wing blogosphere in the UK will be jumping up and down, and generally getting excited about the possibility that the evil America will have universal healthcare, and that troops will be out of Afghanistan and Iraq very soon, so the world can have a big group hug.

They will then turn instantly when Obama has his first meeting with the DoD and the NSA and quietly says "oh fuck me backwards with a pickling fork now I understand why Jed Bartlett acted the way he did even though I didn't really believe it was like that". This will result in them talking in that serious Michael Moore way, and will ensure that people like Tim Ireland keep moaning on about "war, it's legal, it's lovely" for the next four years in the echo chamber that is the UK blogosphere.

Whoever wins tonight it is plain and simple. The so-called "chattering classes" outside of America will still hate him when he doesn't pull out of Iraq instantly and denounce everything Clinton and Bush were saying all along about the "mad mullahs".

Welcome to 2009, and President X, it's going to be just like the last two administrations, the only difference is the time it takes for the sneering to start.

Four more years!

Mandelson makes grab for the UK internet

Truly shocking news over at the Register. Peter Mandelson's business department appears to have started a powergrab for the UK Internet name registrar Nominet. In a letter dated October 15, a senior civil servant at BERR, David Hendon, wrote to niminet stating:

"What arguments would you employ to convince my Ministers that the present relationship between government and the company is appropriate in ensuring that public policy objectives in relation to the management of the domain name system and the standing of the UK in the internet community are understood and taken into account?"

Just imagine if Whitehall controled the .uk domain and the implication that could have. They could take sites hosted in the uk domain offline easily. It would also provide the Government with a massive propaganda tool.

More on the Register

It's not data unless it's yours?

Apparently,. according to Chris Bryant MP, amswering for the Leader of the Commons,

In the last 12 months one laptop has been reported stolen from the Leader of the House of Commons Office. The laptop was used to update the office website and did not contain any personal data or other sensitive information. No data have been lost.

Errr.. excuse me? You lost a laptop. What;s more a functioning laptop. Of course data have been lost. What you mean is "we didn't lost millions of records of personal infromation like our tithead colleagues in other departments".

What you did lose though was a profile on the laptop that contains login details, cookies, browsing habits, passwords etc etc. If the laptop connected to the GSI then that supposedly non-data could be very useful.

Paxman caught faking it?

Amusing exclusive on Guido about a dodgy bit of fakery in the by-line picture of a Mail on sunday article in which Paxman explains why he will be wearing a poppy.

Made all the more amusing given that Paxman slated Dean Godson from Policy Exchange accusing them of fabricating evidence in a report famously saying "Authenticity is all, as you well know."

Whoops!

Mr McNulty you are mistaken....

Today, in a press release about tackling benefit fraud, Tony McNulty, Minister for Employment and Welfare Reform said,

"there is no hiding if you try to steal from the taxpayer"

I beg to differ, you just have to become a politician and you can steal from the taxpayer with ease through dodgy expense claims and the like. Alternatively you can get yourself into Number 10 and steal from them in other ways.

'Elf and Safety myths with a problem

I think it's fair to say that after "poltical correctness" the good old-fashioned "health and safety" story is well established in the media as a means of filling column space. The Health and Safety Executive comes under constant slagging off on blogs too (not least this one).

As a result of the general "elf and safety" madness stories, for the past year or so, the HSE has been running its "Myth of the Month" section detailing a well held tale/rumour and pointing out that they, in most cases, haven't banned anything.

The problem though is that if you actually scroll through each of their myths, there appears to be a constant theme. It is not the law that has banned something but over-zealous jobsworth who largely havn't got a clue what they're doing.

Perhaps therefore it might be an idea to fire all the silly bastards no? Clearly Health and Safety has a problem surely if the people responsible for dealing with it are doing it so badly?

Unsticking a jam?

Anyone who is a driver will probably have had the joy of being stuck in an almight tailback on the motorway caused by a breakdown or accident miles ahead. The kind of incident hat makes you shunt forward and occassionally stop the engine for fear of overheating.

Something that occured to me last night (as I drive past a tailback on the other carriageway) was why do we not build special "U-Turn junctions" between the junctions that are opened in the event of emergencies to divert traffic up the other carriageway to seek alternative routes?

Mothers clearly don't want breastfeeding advice from the Government

No doubt some people will think I'm a terrible sexist and just don't understand the pressure that woman face, but I was unaware that in February this year the Government launched a "National Breastfeeding Helpline" (Tel: 0844 20 909 20).

It cost £150,000 to set-up, it charges people 8p for the first minute and then 5p for subsequent minutes, and it was apparently put in place to support the statistical estimate of 450,000 breastfeeding mothers in any given year.

How many calls has it taken since February? 23,728. That's approximately 97 calls a day. Assuming that figure remains constant to next February, that will work out at a rough total of 35,500 calls in 12 months. That's about £4 spent by the Government for every call made to the line and the recovery of pennies back for the incoming call charges.

Now, call me a heartless male chauvinist if you must, but that just doesn't seem to me to be a decent investment. Just less than 8% of the supposed breastfeeding mothers in the country rang the line which suggests it's actually not needed. Although I bet the Government would say they just need to spend more advertising it.

Tea leaves in the Commons

At the end of last week, the House of Commons Commission was asked, for the third time this year, what had been reported stolen in Palace of Westminster in the last year. In response to Grant Shapps, Nick Harvey referred him to previous answers in February and one two weeks ago on the 13th October.

It was the closing sentence that caught my eye though, which said, "[s]ince then it has been reported that 10 chairs were stolen from Portcullis House". Now, back in 2007 Nick Harvey told the House that the replacement chairs in the cafe alone in Portcullis House cost £57,800, so they're pretty pricey.

Here's what confuses me though, how does one go about stealing ten chairs from a building that has Police officers on every exit? If you did one a day for ten days then someone going to get a bit suspicious surely? Maybe the security is just crap and only looks good?

It's only a matter of time before we're totally rooted

The Mail on Sunday is reporting that crucial access codes and passwords for the Government Gateway systems has been found on a pen drive in a car park. What a surprise, first it was data of people that was lost, now they're losing the passwords to the systems on a bloody memory stick.

The only place passwords ought to be written down is on paper in a safe, and even then it's not the best solution. The people that need the passwords should simply just know them and not need to put them on a memory stick.

This is not the first time I have heard about the Government Gateway. Apparently DWP staff don;t get printed salary slips anymore and can only access them online. That's the sort of information that is invaluable to a fraudster.