Thursday, March 15, 2007

BREAKING NEWS: Self proclaimed Tory is partisan

Not that anyone is probably interested in my personal life, but the other day I set myself on a journey. I was mildly bored and informed a number of other bloggers about this boredom. I decided, because I am utterly puerile and childish, to wind up a certain other blogger who likes to get himself all fired up and write lengthy posts.

Now don't get me wrong, there are some bloggers out there who can achieve the "long post" post with amazing mastery. For example, Paint over that Crossed Pond is probably the master of holding a reader's attention even when he's talking about something boring. Then there are those who don't. They usually fail simply because they right in sporadic disjointed sentences which make the reader want to scroll, or even worse, close the window.

Anyway, I digress, I got bored and decided it was time to poke the hornets nest and see how far I could get the hornets to go whilst getting away without a single sting, and yesterday I achieved just that. In less than a few hundred words I provoked the tirade, the ultimate culmination of a good bait, the essay post.

If people must read it then they will need to either figure out who the said blogger is, or go to Iain Dale's and look for the spam linking in the comments. What did this essay post say? Well, it basically highlighted all the inconsistencies I never said I didn't have and presented them as evidence of my part in the great blogging conspiracy. It also exposed me, a card carrying member of the Tory Party, as partisan. I know that might come as a shock to you, I had to double-check myself.

I can't deny that I'm proud of myself for this childish game, because, quite frankly I am. What makes it all the more amusing is that the blogger in question actually thinks that I care. Yes, honestly. He think that me, a nobody really, actually gives a toss about what he says about me and the perceived injustices that he's crafted in his head.

See what you have to remember is that this guy's like Al Gore. Where Gore invented teh Interweb (All Praise the Gore!), he invented the blogosphere. And anyone who pollutes it with the wrong opinions is well, just wrong. Of course, he himself pollutes the search engines through the use of crosspost linking, link spamming and backtrack, so that when you search for something you get tonnes of irrelevant results. Truth be known though, I only said that to wind the spammer up a little more. At the end of the day though, a scumbag should be called a scumbag.

Anyways, that the breaking news, a Tory (see it says it over there on the Right) is partisan. He's also a bit of piss-taker in his spare time and just fancied playing with a wooden spoon. He promises to write something about politics, or maybe the new 8-way cores that Apple are about to promote later on.


SimonW said...

I read the eloquent prose earlier, sometimes I wonder if he's real and not the personification of someone trying to wind up the whole of blogosphere.
(8 core Apples, the one I ate last night only had one core. No GM fruit here, please!)

Praguetory said...

Well done on the endorsement. Here's mine. I am a nasty, evil, hypocritical ego-driven partisan parasite. I took this to mean I am a Tory who has been known to embarass Lefties.

Garry said...

"Where Gore invented teh Interweb..."

Urban myths are neither clever nor funny.

There is, I think, a difference between being politically partisan and being a truth distorting propagandist.

Anonymous said...

He has bought the Cameroon/Blairesque middle ground crap completely

Garry said...

Apologies for going off-topic but since PT is here, I would like to ask he ever got round to looking at the evidence of Guido's "beyond the pale" activities? (I won't "spam" the relevant link. PT knows what I mean.)

I only ask because people may be starting to think he's a coward who runs away when he's not got any answers and I'm sure none of us wants that.

Anyway. Must dash, Got stuff to do this afternoon. I'll check back to see if any answer is forthcoming later.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if he would think my blog was partisan?

Anonymous said...

That Paint chap at theCrossedPond isn't a patch on the same site's Adam, I say.

That Adam guy is just great. Great, I say.

Croydonian said...

"What is Truth? said jesting Pilate; and would not stay for an answer".

Praguetory said...

Stop giggling at the back. He only said he created the internet. Oh forget it. Let's all laugh and point.

dizzy said...

Curious Hamster, urban myth are funny if their intended target audience is Adam from Cross Pond who is, of course, simple great.

Anonymous said...

CuriousHamster said...
There is, I think, a difference between being politically partisan and being a truth distorting propagandist.

Yes. But it is so much harder to spot when it they are doing it for your side. Or is "They may be gits, but they are our gits" acceptable logic from the left.
Tell me, which is the reason you still co-operate with Tim Ireland?

Guido 2.0 said...

Tch. You left out the bit where you're a total hypocrite.

Sending a bulk unsolicited email to many bloggers seeking link exchanges.. is spam.

Making an on-topic point at the website of another blogger and including two relevant links to back that point... is not spam.

But it's pretty obvious why you would have others think otherwise.

PS - Not linking to the post yourself, then? Bit cowardly, isn't it? Almost as cowardly as pretending that you're someone else in a comments thread so you can slag others off and back yourself to the hilt, yes?

Guido 2.0 said...

Put the link in your post, you coward.

PS - Surely what you claim to be link-spamming should not draw criticism. After all, no servers collapsed.

dizzy said...

hehehe.. cast it wide and reel him in! He shoots! He scores again! And no need for a referrer link either - another brilliant idea of mine even if I do say so myself! You see, it's a bit like taunting a mutt with a bone. Whilst you know that they'll go for it, you also know they're stupid enough not to realise they're being played.

I tell you what Lassie, I'll let you post your spam link in here just the once. It's not like you're going to get oodles of traffic from it like you would when you spam other people's blogs with links to your inane ramblings. I might even buy you some pedigree chum as well.

Guido 2.0 said...

(ooooh,... a time warp)

dizzy said...

oh dear, time shift going due to corrective typos by me. Such is life. For the two (if I'm lucky) people watching this (other than Lassie who clearly has it on refresh because he's sad). Readers should realise that Lassie's last comment should actually appear after mine, but sadly I made some dyslexic errors which needed to be rectified resulting in the cock-up.

Now Lassie, I've already told you, you're free to link to your post in these commments. Given that I've graciously given you permission to do so it won't be spam, so for once you won't be a spammer, this is surely a good thing Lassie?

Now you can keep calling me a coward all you like, but you have to understand is, and admittedly I've told you this many times before so hopefully it will sink in to the reduced canine brain soon is.... I don't care what you say because you're a nobody.

Guido 2.0 said...

You sure seemed to care when you went shouty-crackers the other night.

Oh, Manic is sorry... he forgot that you were *pretending*.

PS - Dizzy, be a courageous person... link to it yourself in the post. (Alternatively, pretend to be someone else in comments and link to it down here.)

Tim Ireland Too said...

I'm trying to decide whether to continue this campaign (thus admitting you are important) or try to keep up the pretence that you are insignificant to me.

dizzy said...

This would be the other night when I told you you were not important enough for me to waste my time on when I wasn't being paid and then asked you if you still lived with your mum, yes?

Courageous? Not me. I run a mile the minute I see spider. I'm scared shitless of people reading what you've said about me. I mean, I might cry *sniff* if I think just one person has read your demolition job on *sniff*. Please Lassie *sob* just put me out of my misery and post the link. I promise never to cross you again. You're so great and wonderful, and such a God amongst bloggers after all.

ahhhh who the fuck I am kidding? The floor is yours Lassie. I'm afraid I'm not going to actively send traffic to a *plonked* site.

Tim Ireland Too said...

Anyone for a foursome? At the moment, it's just Manic, Guido 2.0 and Tim Ireland here.

Guido 2.0 said...

No, that would be the other night went you went postal, claimed that "all online marketing is essentially legalised spamming" and submitted my domain name to 'distributed (anti-spam) blacklists'.

ahhhh who the fuck I am kidding?

Congratulations on your first sensible question.

dizzy said...

Lassie has until I go to bed to post the link himself, then the thread will be locked. I am bored with it.

Anonymous said...

You can cut the tension in here with a knife. Or possibly a sharpened blancmange.

dizzy said...

"No, that would be the other night went you went postal, claimed that "all online marketing is essentially legalised spamming"

It is.

and submitted my domain name to 'distributed (anti-spam) blacklists'."

You didn't believe that about the distributed blacklists did you? Hahahaha! Sucker!

I only added you to my SpamAssasin but that's because you're emails are like a bad case of thrush.

Guido 2.0 said...

Tch... not the 'bored' gambit again. Run out of tricks so soon?

Very well.... here is your link:

Please Note - any comment from Dizzy, or any anonymous comment in support of Dizzy or his case should be regarded with suspicion for the following reasons:

- Just like Jackie Danicki, Dizzy likes to make baseless accusations and run away when they are challenged.

- Dizzy is just a little bit of a hypocrite.

- Dizzy uses sock-puppets.

- How many sock-puppets Dizzy uses to defend himself or 'Guido' and/or rubbish/bully opponents remains a matter for debate.

dizzy said...

See Lassie, it wasn't hard was it! Good doggy! I may even give you a treat for doing as you were told!

Thread locked.