Wednesday, March 18, 2009

MPs talk to birds and encourage them to "have a bunk up"?

Last week, I introduced a competition called EDM Signature Whores® which would attempt to catalogue the worst offenders in Parliament who happily sign pointless motions that never get debated but which all cost the taxpayer hundreds of thousands of pounds each year.

As I mentioned in that post, and in previous posts, EDMs are "parliamentary graffiti", a term echoed by John Redwood. Most of the time they get used by some desperate MP who wants publicity, so, he or she, tables an EDM about their local football team that no one gives a crap about, and then the local paper runs a report praising the MP for talking about them in Parliament. Everyone's a winner!

So I decided, as is common practice these days, to check out what utterly pointless EDMs have been tabled recently and the waste of space MPs have provided entertainment once more. The Islington South Labour MP, Emily Thornberry you see has tabled a motion to say "hello" to a couple of birds and wish them well in their sexual reproductive bed.
That this House welcomes the arrival of two peregrine falcons to the Palace of Westminster; notes that peregrine falcons are a protected species; further notes that peregrines breed in late March and April and congratulates the Palace authorities and Natural England on providing a nesting box for the pair; and wishes these two new residents all the best in their new home and hopes there will soon be a clutch of eggs.
They're bloody birds! Sure they're protected, but they have bugger all idea that you have "wished them well". Nor do they need Parlimentary blessing to get their proverbial leg over.

Seriously, that's a few hundred pounds spent on printing and administration so Thornberry, along with her Parlimentary colleagues that signed it, can make themselves feel all fluffy inside and flash their animal loving credentials.

To think there is the deepest recession for 50 years, the economy is in the largest peacetime deficit ever, unemployment has topped 2 million and this bunch of idiots are wasting taxpayers money, and Parliamentary time, talking about whether two birds are going to have a shag? They'll be encouraging tree hugging next.

God give me strength! Please excuse me whilst I go and smash things up for a while.

4 comments:

haddock said...

I have watched a local council spend thousands of pounds trying to clear pigeon crap from a building... to no avail, the birds just crap some more.
Peregrines eat pigeons and scare the crap out of them.... leaving none to despoil and erode the stone of the building.
so not quite as fluffy bunny waste of time as it first looks.

dizzy said...

I'm not saying the presence of these birds is waste of time. I'm saying tabling a motion about it and hoping that they reproduce is a waste of time and money.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster said...

CAN CAMERON RESUSCITATE THE NHS?

wv = dumbois, hehe

Letters From A Tory said...

When I saw 'MPs talk to birds...', I thought Lembit had bagged another popstar.