Sunday, January 13, 2008

Off to court in the morning...

Blogging will be quite light for the next fortnight, this is because I have, rather annoyingly, been called up for Jury Service. Rest assured that whoever it is I'm sure they will be guilty. Shifty eyes, bad hair, and whatever other subjective rash prejudgments I can make will ensure that is the case.
Note: For any idiots who think I am being serious about the prejudgements thing. You're idiots.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're only saying that in the hope that defence Counsel picks it up an d asks for you to be didqualified!

Anonymous said...

I don't know what your views on the jury system are, Dizzy, but I'd be interested to know what your closing thoughts when it's all over. I thought it was going to be a chore when I got my first call a few years ago, but it swung me over 100% to keeping it for as many trials as possible, whereas previously I'd been a sort of 70/30 chap. Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

Check which party the defendant supports, while you're at it.

Anonymous said...

Wear your best suit and carry a Daily Telegraph under your arm.You will be challenged every time and will be home early every day if you don't feel like bothering.

Angry Steve said...

I served on a High Court jury here in Scotland...

Turned up in a suit, with the FT under my arm. Apparently they'll only challenge you if you know someone involved / live in close proximity to them.

Suffice to say, I was there for a week. Court food is really crap.

Mulligan said...

Rather a shame the defendant is not Mr Tangoman, I somehow doubt you'd be the Henry Fonda character arguing his innocence.

Bound to be some poor sap who put his rubbish in the wrong type of bin.

Tony said...

My prediction, especially if you are marked as being able to return to your gainful employment for half or whole days, is that you will sit round for about long enough to read the paper every morning then be released as a bunch of trials haven't started that day and you are in the first group economically sensible to let go.

Praguetory said...

Blogging whilst on jury service - a recipe for disaster. I did my jury service aged 18 in my school holiday after my A levels. Got a fraudster deported and let off the wife-beater. ;-)

Damon Lord said...

If they even look like a chav, send them to the gallows.

What's that? Death penalty abolished? Sod it.

Geezer said...

I've found that being a self-employed contractor, I always have the perfect excuses for getting out of jury service.
1) I don't get paid, because I won't be working.
2) Their expenses will not nearly cover my earnings and
3)The client is quite at liberty to cancel my contract and find someone else to do the job.

My dad did jury service many years ago, an assault case, and I asked him if the defendant was guilty, and if so when did he realise, he said they found him guilty and he realised as soon as he set eyes on him, "he looked guilty, you could see it in his face" and my dad was an intelligent and otherwise fair-minded man, but he knew a chav herbert when he saw one!

Anonymous said...

"shifty eyed "etc. Tut, that is no way to talk of the judge.

Anonymous said...

Dizzy, you're not in Ipswich by any chance?! yikes.